Celebrating Moms Through Loss

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Photo by Ian Keefe on Unsplash

How are you celebrating that special Mom in your life this Mother’s Day? Breakfast in bed? Extravagant brunch out? Massage certificate? Flowers? Jewelry? How are you hoping to be honored this Mother’s Day? Sleeping in? A day off from wiping butts and cleaning up piles of toys? A day at the beach with no responsibility? Time and quiet to read a book?

Whatever you are hoping for, and however you hope to celebrate a Mother, I hope you have a wonderful Mother’s Day!

There are some Moms out who will not be able to celebrate Mother’s Day the way they would envision. As a mother who knows too many other mothers who have experienced the loss of a child, and as a mother who has suffered miscarriage herself and currently mothers a child with a terminal diagnosis, I am acutely aware of those that are missing on Mother’s Day. Whether you are missing your own mother figure, longing for a child that has not come to be or missing a child who has died, I am thinking about you.

I don’t think that loss should dampen the celebration of Moms. If you have not experienced direct loss yourself, I am just writing to ask you to pause for a moment and think of other who aren’t with intact families today. Remember them and what they grieve. Reach out, say their Mother’s name or their Child’s name. Those names are music to their ears.

Whether on Sunday or anytime this week. Do not fear making us cry. We cry anyway. But hold our hand or give us a hug if you can.

Celebrate the blessings in your own life.

Look at the time you have as a priceless gift.

Take the time to hug, to cuddle and to say one more “I Love You”. 

If you are experiencing loss on Mother’s Day, please celebrate the memories and blessings you have. I do acutely understand the ability to get lose oneself in grief and despair. I also understand how important it is to look up and to look around. It is hard to untangle joy from pain. Studies show proof that pain and love intermingle. You are not alone. 

How has loss changed your Mother’s Day experience?