No More Nagging—A Mother’s Reminder

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The nagging mom!

When did this happen? How did I let this happen? 

I told myself I would never nag my kids, before I had kids. 

I have two good girls. They don’t talk back, they don’t lie, and they are capable of completing tasks when requested, so why the need to nag?

I find myself constantly yelling,

“chew with your mouth closed”

 “sit up straight”

“comb your hair”

“go play outside”

“pick up your clothes”

My husband recently told me I should “let up” on the girls. I felt terrible. My intention was never to make them feel bad or punish them. I sat on the floor and began to think about how I’m feeling when the nagging starts. When you think about it, nagging is not the issue but a symptom of something else.  

When my to-do list feels long, I start to nag. Feeling anxious about tasks, it’s easier to place the pressure somewhere else. I’ll nag about a tee-shirt on the floor or a couple of glasses left in the room.  

When I feel uncomfortable in my own skin, I start to nag. Days when I can’t work out and my clothes feel snug, I shift my focus. I’ll complain about them looking sloppy or hair being messy. Being vocal about appearance is a battle for me.  

When I think I have failed in some way, I start to nag.  Times when the day didn’t go well or I don’t know how to solve a problem. I’ll try to fix things around me. Telling my girls to sit up straight, don’t stuff their face, and chew with their mouth closed. The things I can control.

Definition of Nagging – constantly harassing someone to do something

The word HARASS is not nice! There is a way to teach, guide and delegate without harassing. Nagging is a way to point out faults and can make people feel bad, without giving a resolution.  

A couple of ways to “let up” on nagging. 

Think before I speak. Is what I’m saying necessary, is it kind and is it true? If yes then carry on. 

Point out a positive before a negative. This is something I should do more. “I love how your clean room looks”, now put the clothes away 😉 

Remember words matter—so choose them carefully!