Hey, you, my loving family member who always tries to be there for me at every turn.
I appreciate you. You’re loved, you make me feel loved, and no person could ask for more support from another human being. You never hesitate to jump in and help me when you can with the kiddo, especially when he was an infant and I was still healing from birth. Man, that was a huge help!
But something’s different in your perception lately of me and my abilities as a mother and we need to pump the breaks on this road trip, fast. I’m afraid that my asking for help early on established a cloud of assumption that I don’t really want this parenting job. Or, that I’m so tired that I’m at a breaking point. Or, one more diaper change is going to make me snap.
I love being at home, raising my son. We do a lot, all day, but I won’t recount for you what it was because I don’t give itineraries.
When I’m cross with him, do not interject or interrupt me. I’m in the process of communicating with my son and trying to turn the situation into a teachable moment. The same goes for when he’s cross at me. Please do not swoop in and carry him off as if something is about to explode between us. Nevermind that you just undermined me, and taught him to run away from me when he has a negative feeling. That’s not right.
When I’m describing a certain parenting method that we’re currently doing at home, don’t laugh it off with your own version and disregard ours. I understand there are rules in different houses, but if you can’t respect the wishes of the parents, then there’s really no reason to be around my son.
Oh… the icing on this cake… the assumption that I’m about to collapse under the pressures of being a mother. Let me just stress that when I take a break on a weekend, a day, even an hour for myself, it’s not because I’m about to explode at my family. It’s because I’m still human and other activities outside of being a wife and motherhood still define me that I should be allowed to keep pursuing.
This life I choose still offers me everything I ever wanted. I unfortunately just made the mistake of not establishing my boundaries from day one.
The thing I wish to stress the most, this mommy doesn’t always need a break.
